What are the effects of mass dissuasion? Particularly on the demented and the obese, and the crippled carriers of woe and burden? What is it that makes their suffering replete with justification and beautiful righteous meaning?

-Hoffman F. Price

I feel, sometimes – often times, even – that I’m completely separated from the eternal Truth, separated from human communication, pushed to uncomfortable limits (which I often force myself towards in the hopes of experiencing life more tangibly), I feel like the boundaries of life as I’m seeing them now hold fewer bubbling potentialities and more pain and loss than I’m yet capable to contend with.

That’s not to say that I’m lacking in certain achievements and increased abilities, new understandings to bring me hope and fill me with a sense of well-being. For instance, in the last couple weeks I’ve come to Know that people don’t mean a lot of what they say. We go around judging people by improvised thoughts and comments, we develop these superficial impressions of people and hold them as accurate enough to hold against or in favor of the individual in question. And we force said individual into defending that thought by taking it seriously, rather than encouraging reflection and a deeper connection with his thoughts and beliefs. You can’t understand a person in such a straight-forward fashion, you can’t believe in specific words and phrases uttered under the pressure of a specific moment, you need a pattern of thought, repeated utterances in varying environments and conditions, and most importantly a series of actions. And even then you only have a partial picture that you can spend years filling in.

In accepting that Knowing a person is a much more complex interaction than merely having an idea of him based on specific, isolated utterances I feel like I’ve gained one more unit of enlightenment for myself (a trifling matter to many, but it’s one which provides me with vast quantities of aesthetic ecstasy). I strive so desperately for that sensation, for that experience of deeper insight and fuller understanding. And what you understand, what gives you strength, you should share with others, because only others can point out how much shit you’re full of.

Flash Gordon’s erotic adventures explain what words can’t:

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